I want to be less materialistic, only needing the bare minimum of things. I never realize how much crap I have until I move and I always vow that I will try to get rid of some of the clutter before I have to move again. Yet I always seem to take on more and more things and I hate it.
I desire to get all of my possessions down to a car load. I want to be nomadic and just pack up and move whenever I need or want to. I have a long ways to go to get to that point, but one can dream. I just need to start throwing things out and quit buying new things. I hate that I want new things when I have a hard time parting with my old ones.
But I wonder, why am I so materialistic? I wasn't necessarily spoiled as a child and definitely didn't get everything I wanted. (I mean I am still waiting for that pony...) But really, I guess I could blame it on being 'American' and our lifestyle. We are never satisfied and always want the best of the best right now. Instant gratification is such a natural thing for Americans and I am just a product of my environment. It's a bit of a cop out, but I don't want to be that way anymore. I appreciate the privileges I have been given by living in this country, but maybe I need a break from it to appreciate it more and find what is really important to me.
I also need to simplify my life emotionally and get rid of some of that baggage also. I am sick of putting effort into relationships with others and not getting anything back. No more high-maintenance people in my life. I am done trying to please and appease some people. It is kind of sad, but my life and time can be better spent on others who encourage me and make me a better person. I want to be surrounded by positive influence and some people just give off a bad vibe or rub me the wrong way...so I'm done.
So there. Too honest? Probably, but I just want to refocus my time and energy to the things and people that deserve it the most. And I think that is a pretty great thing.
Peace.
